when men are not men



This is hilarious to me. Someone has come up with an algorithm to determine whether you are male or female based on word patterns in writing. This is especially funny because the guy who posted this originally [or at least the guy who posted it where I saw it] tested a bunch of guys on other sites he frequents and most of them came up girls. He has a tech site and the guys he tested were other guys with tech sites and the results suggest either guys with tech sites are highly feminine [a possibility] or the algorithm people who invented GENDER GENIE [I am not kidding that is really its name] got it entirely wrong but either way is fun for me I am off to test guys I know and mock them within an inch of their lives if they come up “girl.”

[This will totally cut back on dating possibilities for 2007 but dating possibilities were slim going in and this fun is a sure thing yay!]

Also for scientific purposes I tried it out on me first with two pieces: Annette’s Whale and I’ll Sleep With You If You Make My Movie. [Hey, it is for science, damn it.]

I’ll Sleep With You If You Make My Movie: Gender Genie says —

Words: 320
[NOTE: Gender Genie says it works best on texts of more than 500 words but this is a blog, how many blog posts actually are over 500 words?]

Female Score: 675
Male Score: 430

The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: female! [yay!]

Annette’s Whale: Gender Genie says —

Words: 798
[NOTE: Just to be really scientific I thought I better throw in a truly over 500 word piece.]

Female Score: 1344
Male Score: 923

The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: female! [yay!]

Whew! Still a girl. Good thing. I do not know what I would do with all these pretty shoes if I were not.

And now for the guys. [Cue scary music.]

Rochelle: Rochelle really is a guy even though the name might make you wonder. I put in Rochelle’s blog post Marvel or DC?. That looked pretty manly. Gender Genie says —

Words: 489

Female Score: 308
Male Score: 609

The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: male!

Good going, Roche, you are a real man. [I knew that Roche helped me move a refrigerator but hey you need a base point for spiffy science like this.]

Chris: We call Chris “Loofa Bunny” around the workshop due to an unfortunate incident in chat which kind of makes you wonder. I put in Chris’s blog post When the World is Running Down. I was a little worried it might be too intellectual to be manly manly. Gender Genie says —

Words: 433

Female Score: 439
Male Score: 748

The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: male!

Way to go Chris. You are officially a manly man. Wow. We may have to call you Mister Loofa Bunny from here on out.

[It is looking grim for those tech boys, they all showed up as girls and the screenwriter boys are coming out manly men.

Rob: Rob is a father of two that has got to be manly. I put in Rob’s blog post Best Laid Plans — One Year Later. Gender Genie says —

Words: 426

Female Score: 730
Male Score: 542

The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: female!

Uh oh, Rob. Maybe it is time for a little more bran, a little less raisin. I do not think those cute kid nicknames helped either. And you just ruined the screenwriting boys’ perfect score. This is so disturbing. I have to go lie down now….

Tune in next time. Same Gender Genie time. Same Gender Genie station. As your intrepid Adams Girl works her way through the list of unwary screenwriter guys bookmarked in her browser.

Love and Kisses,

Your Still A Girl Adams Girl



take the test : gender genie

where i found this : graceful flavor [can you believe a guy with a site titled “graceful flavor” came up male?]

where the photo came from : those are the boys from “to wong fu thanks for everything julie newmar” and that is a press still so i figure safe to post here you can see more at

34 Responses to when men are not men

  1. Cool test. I did about 6 of my entries and it was about half and half. No strong male or strong female results.
    And I always thought of myself as girly-girl.

  2. max

    There is no half and half. There is male or female. I mean, unless it says tranny, and I have not seen it do that but I guess it could happen.

  3. max

    PS: Jeez, maybe I should not have mocked those tech boys my dashboard just went all haywire think it is revenge of the girly tech boys?

  4. Half of my entries I tested came back “male,” and half read “female.”

    I would not have tested so many if the first ones had not resulted in “male.”

  5. aj

    I got two female and one male result. Guess that makes me a girl, just not a girly-girl.

  6. max

    Wow, that is one I did not see coming. You are totally a girly girl. [I meant Kitty, not you AJ, you are not a girly girl, you are a full of sass girl.]

    Did WordPress just get hacked or was it just me? My avatar got wiped and my dashboard kept trying to yank me onto another site. Odd.

  7. Uh oh, the Russians are coming.

  8. This is disturbing. I put in my blog about the Clay concert and I came up male.


  9. Sophia

    Michele’s last comment cracked me up. Underlying messages… LOL!

  10. Love the To Wong Foo addition…

    Fortunately(?), I’m still female. Two out of two was enough for me to stop pressing my luck. The truth is, I’m merely a feminine writer. So don’t sweat it, ladies. Some football player out there right now is wearing panty hose. And he’s not gay.

    Have a wonderful day!

  11. I write like a female.


  12. ballgame

    That is a cool toy.

    Though I’m blogless at the moment, I keep a copy of comments I make on others’ blogs, so I did a few of those. (I’m pretty wordy, so they were near or over the 500 word target.) Some came up strongly male, others came up moderately female. The pattern quickly became evident: comments where I’m being highly analytical/ argumentative/ detached/ cold came up male, while those where I’m being casual/ emotive/ expressive came up female. Which I think is a sad commentary on our gender norms more than anything.

    Hey … I like being able to write on both sides of the street!


  13. Brut Bunny

    2 outta 2 male. cheshercat writes like a female becauses she kisses with her eyes open.

  14. max

    Hey, Brut Bunny. You found the party. Did you bring the vodka?

  15. Brut Bunny

    I have always read your blogs Max as well as all the other gals that you hang with. But, as you know I’m basically just a shy guy. The vodka is Chopin, Polish potato vodka. Comes in a a pretty bottle with the musicians image inside magnified by the vodka. I’ll be trying it tonight for the first time. If I can I’ll bring it to your blog fest tonight. BUT, I am not getting neked. The last time you made me do that I got a cold and was sick for a week.

  16. max

    Oh you complainer, sure you were sick for a week, but the poor duck was sick for two.

    Polish wodka. Yay!

  17. Brut Bunny

    Duck??? You had told me it was a cat. I should never drink Sterno. It does things to me.

  18. Brut Bunny

    Duck??? You had told me it was a cat. I should never drink Sterno.

  19. max

    No no, I said the duck’s name was Cat.

    Surely you do not think a CAT would have endured those indignities?

  20. max

    [ps: brut bunny, i hope you are noticing i did not even touch that “i am shy” bit it would just be vulgar of me to hit a target that easy]

  21. Brut Bunny

    Yep, I sure did notice and may your gentleness toward Brut be extended into the new year. And I know why I always get into trouble at your swahreys. It’s the time difference. Like tonight, I have a three hour head start on the sauce… well actually six, i’ve already started.

  22. max

    I have been puzzling over that “gentle” thing ever since reading that post and finally I get it.

    You. Were. Being. Sarcastic.


  23. Late to the game on this…

    I entered a poem about erotic geometry, which is quite obviously written from a male point of view.

    Female Score: 163
    Male Score: 71

    The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: female!

    Does this mean I should stop the Estrogen therapy?

  24. max

    No, but you might need a break from math.

  25. I don’t know. It was just starting to get interesting. :D

  26. max

    Someone hurt me before I start riffing bad tangent puns.

  27. [reused geometry pun ahead]

    Yeah… you might get “Touched by an Angle”

    There. That had to hurt.

  28. max


    I am calling your parents you are in so much trouble.

  29. Is that all?

    I was afraid you were going to do something serious, like put my neck in a hypotenuse.

  30. max

    I am from the humanities. Stop that.

  31. [In the voice of the Hindenburg radio announcer]

    “Oh the humanities…”

    That better?

  32. max

    You are going to hell for this Firm. You know that right?

  33. Of course. My handbasket awaits. ;)

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