today i am a god


today i am a godToday I —

Dropped new memory into the computer.

Nifty, right? Except. It did not work. It took the whole computer down. So here I was thinking, Oh fuck, I killed the computer. This is so bad! Bad, Max, Bad!

I pulled the memory card out and the computer worked again. I put it back in. No good.

The thing is. A memory board should not do that unless something is horribly wrong. And. Well. Something could be horribly wrong. I could have ordered the wrong memory board. But I messed around with things, looked things up, I started to get mad. I mean, I am not a stupid girl, and while I do not no like taking computers apart and adding new components because I am always panicked about the static electricity thing that I have never even seen slow down anyone who slams computers apart and together again, I was pretty damn sure I ordered the right board. I mean, I know the computer, it was the right board, it had to be, right?

So. I started over.

Took the computer apart again.

Put in the board again.

[This is actually pretty simple on a G4 cube, it is like Legos, you put the little piece in and apply pressure and click, it is in place and should work, it is not freaking rocket science already, it should work.]

This time the system came up and the computer knew it had more memory. Yay! Only every time I launched a program, the computer shut off. Okay, this computer is a G4 cube. It has a light sensitive on off switch. A tech guy took it apart the other day and put it back together. I think, this is not a memory issue, this going on and off thing, the only reason this thing should be shutting off and on, if that memory board is working, is something is messing with the light sensor and/or the computer reading its own damn material.

[This was a big issue when the computer first came out, this light sensor thing, I had to replace a computer washer just to make this thing work right the first time straight out of the factory.]

So. I take it all apart. AGAIN. Praying to the Gods of static electricity and promising I won’t care if socks stick to my panty hose in public if they just don’t fry the computer. AGAIN. And. I check the hard drive mounting.

Hello. Tech Guy did not tighten one of the screws right. One of the screws that, if it is off, well, the whole machine loses balance at a really special alignment that effects the whole on off switch scenario that is light sensitive on this computer and can crumble if just one little rubber washer isn’t just right.

I tighten the screw.

I put it back together.

Everything works.

Holy Bejeez! It WORKS!


Okay. Today. I. Am. A. God.

Do not panic. I always feel this way when I surmount an insurmountable computer problem. I will get over myself in a few hours. Just let me experience a moment of abject godness for fixing something that should not have been off in the first place and actually being savvy enough to work backwards and figure out what to check to find out what was wrong in the first place and also charming the Gods of Static AND going into the computer not once but so many freaking times and — it works. It all WORKS.


The computer has SO much memory.


Oh. And if all the I am a God today stuff gets too out of hand, just remind me I put a screw driver through one of the freon pipes in the freezer three days ago and am packing ice just to keep my Cokes cold till I get around to coping with that. But wait a day. I want to be a god for at least a day. Then you can remind me about the dumb freon your fridge is dead because that is no way to defrost a freezer fiasco.

Love and Kisses,

Your I Am A God Today Adams Girl


ps: i have a working printer and scanner again too yay!

pps: is there something mildly off about a person who puts computers before food?, you know i won’t even touch or bother with that refrigerator til the computer is all up and running hot i wonder if i should worry about that…


where the art work comes from :
that is from cantikfoto

5 Responses to today i am a god

  1. You are most certainly a goddess. Not just today, either. Whew, take a day off, too. You deserve it.

  2. aj

    I think it’s a bit dodgy you chose computers over food, so I am just telling myself that chocolate and coke fall under a different banner.

  3. Oh my God, I just looked at your blog roll and saw “people who suck.”
    That is hilarious.

  4. max

    Ah that. Yes. Well. Sometimes I amuse myself way too much late at night.

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