things i learned in the woods
Gets to me and I start thinking romantic thoughts about the country. Then I must pull out little reminders for myself absence makes the heart grow fonder and in reality the country is not for the faint of heart. Ever.
One of those reminders is —
Things I Learned in the Woods
Mac G4’s do not plug into DC power.
Poison oak is not thwarted by sunblock.
To you, that old wood pile looks like a nice shady spot to sit. To 5,000 wood scorpions, it is home.
“Oh that looks like a nice harmless garden spider to me” is not a Winston Churchhill quote.
“Perhaps raccoons will stay out of the cans if I put them on the porch” sounds good until you are nailing up all new porch screens.
Dogs do not believe you when you say “lilly ponds are not fun.”
Human skin is not the ecology they mean when they label laundry detergent “ecologically friendly.”
Skunks do not turn their backs when they attack — but they do a nifty tap dance.
Dominoes does not deliver to “the last house past the big rock on your left.”
Cats think all those stories about bears are made up till they meet one.
Cats can outrun bears. You had better be wearing Nikes.