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stil made me do it

 

jean_shorts_iiStil is making me tell this story.

Way way back on Columbus Day Stil and I went to the beach. And did beach things. Till it was getting later and we were walking the path back to the boardwalk. [There is not really a boardwalk I just call it that, it is a main strip of concrete full of little open air stands selling cheap sunglasses and beachy stuff running along the Venice beach front.]

We are walking along and there is this couple in front of us. They are definitely a couple. They are holding hands. The guy is tall. Kind of awkward and angular. In that awkward angular guy way some guys are just awkwardly lanky and tall but not in an unattractive way. The woman is short. Squat. Okay squat is being kind —

She has an ass the size of New Jersey.

She is wearing jeans too tight and too low that force skin to bulge above her jean “waistline” [that cannot be good for circulation] and also create lower body bulging that will never be mistaken for fabric bunching. She has a cheap shirt on. Flip flops. And long dark hair that can only be described as Blair Witch friendly.

I look at her. I look at him. I look at Stil. I say, SHE has a boyfriend.

Stil cracks up really hard.

 

where the art work comes from :
that is from jenny buffay

0 Responses to stil made me do it

  1. She has an ass the size of New Jersey.

    Max you are so wrong. I love it!

  2. max

    Well being the size of New Jersey is not a big deal but having an ass shaped like New Jersey because you are wearing pants that deform — yipes.

    [That is just me being bitter Miss New Jersey is going home with someone I am not.]

  3. forkboy1965

    Hey! My girlfriend’s ass is NOT that big.

    Newark-sized; yes. But not all of New Jersey!

    Bitch.

    ;-)

  4. At least she didn’t say TEXAS!

  5. max

    I am sorry Fork but you really need to talk to her about those pants.

  6. Lucia

    puhaha…you really made me laugh. that was mean but i can totally get it, hahaha.

  7. Lucia

    puhaha…you really made me laugh. that was mean but i totally got it, hahaha. by the way, are you on facebook, max? i was looking for you the other day and there were so many max adams.

  8. Kym

    But she’s really nice and has a great sense of humor.

  9. Beth

    Don’t take it to heart.

    I once knew a skinny little guy with a Texas sized girlfriend. I was told ‘he won’t even look at a girl unless she outweighs him by 100 lbs’.

    …no accounting for taste;)

  10. Well, like they say, to each their own. We sometimes forget that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. An old episode of Wife Swap reminded me of this when the husband proclaimed his love for big women and how he wished his 200 lb plus wife would put on more weight.

    All I could think was, Wow?

  11. Lucia

    hahaha…so true, so true. when i read the story, i thought i could make a great seinfeld episode. i could even imagine their facial expressions to be. :-)

    hmm, i wonder how i left 2 entries above, I just made a correct so I thought the 1st one would be gone. sorry.

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