slim fast is a device of the devil


milkshakerI have to do breakfast.

If I do not do breakfast I get sick. But things get frenetic and I am not good at dealing with anything food in the morning so I have been looking for breakfast cheats.

I tried bagels but honestly the whole toast it and spread something on it sitch got away from me. So my next cheat trial was Ensure. I thought, Well try it it is supposed to be like liquid food that is easy right?

The Ensure kind of works out too. It is not delicious but it is not gross either I can suck a can down in the morning no prob. As long as I remember to open one.

Then I thought, Well gee I could try Slim-Fast that is less cals and also cheaper and maybe that would work out too.

Um. No. Slim-Fast is totally gross. I mean it. It does not even taste like its origin is food it tastes like some mystery liquid that maybe mutated from something metallic and medicinal on another planet.

Back to the old person drink. That at least I can put in my mouth and swallow instead of this stand off where the Slim-Fast sits, I sit, and we glare at each other until I have braced enough to take another sip.


where the art work comes from :
that is milkshaker by christy lincoln

29 Responses to slim fast is a device of the devil

  1. Lol – my sister works for Slimfast. I have always refused to even try it.

  2. californiablogging

    Slim fast is yucky. Ensure is forced on the anorexics so it’s not just for old people.

  3. conundrum

    I frequently use the slimfast for breakfast technique – it is amazingly convenient and great if one needs to take meds in the morning.

    I prefer the french vanilla but it must be very cold. Not-cold-slimfast is ugly on the tongue.

  4. I like the chocolate slim and the funny thing is- I don’t like chocolate at all.

    I know Max.

    Ignore Mode.

  5. AdvantEdge (made by EAS) has a good French Vanilla that is just 100 calories and is high in protein. It tastes great in coffee too, if you drink coffee.

  6. Max, if you weren’t going to say it…

    Slim-Fast IS gross. It’s like recycled vomit flavored with tons of sugar.

    Here you go:

    Stiletto approved. Chocolate flavor rules!

  7. Are you sure? I pay $2.50 at the gym where it is usually marked up!

  8. max

    Oh, wait, $3 — I was thinking six pack but that page actually says twelve pack.

  9. Ensure? I put that stuff in so many feeding tubes, the smell of it makes me gag. One time when I went to work for another hospital, during orientation they made us nurses take a sip of that stuff. Like we had no idea what that crap tastes like… I almost spewed.

    But it is healthy. Drink on.

  10. Kym

    Does anybody else like homemade popovers, piping hot, butter melted into a glorious golden glow, topped with raspberry jam?

    Hmm, I guess not. But, Lordy guys, is Ensure or Slimfast even food?

  11. “Does anybody else like homemade popovers, piping hot, butter melted into a glorious golden glow, topped with raspberry jam?”

    Honestly, no lol

    I truly enjoy my turkey bacon, egg whites with low fat cheese and oatmeal with cinnamon and raisins :)

    However, as a drunken late night snack…well, that’s another story!

  12. Max, try that shake. It’s truly delicious. If you don’t like it I’ll buy them from you.

  13. max

    Does it come in vanilla? I do not care much for chocolate flavored drinks.

  14. I’m the same. I eat cinnamon roll Zone bars.

  15. Oh, yes it does come in vanilla.

  16. I would drink Ensure from time to time when I was sick. I could never take it straight. I always mixed it with ice cream and made a shake. Tolerable.

  17. max

    Well that is as much work as making a bagel.

  18. Gee, Max, drinking it takes some effort too.


  19. max

    It does. The whole food thing is just exhausting.

  20. Yeah, wouldn’t it be nice to have an IV you can stick in and be off and running?

  21. max

    I think it would be nice if someone I know who makes potroast lived closer.

  22. Funny girl! Sigh. I do wish I lived closer too. But after awhile you’d tire of me drinking all your vodka.

    BTW, I suspected you liked pot roast…I thought to myself as I put away two pounds of leftover – I bet Max would have gobbled this all up!

  23. max

    Sure you were not thinking, Ha! No paws on these leftovers Adams.

  24. max

    You are so a fibber.

  25. It’s Pumpkin, not I. Pumpkin marked her territory.

    With her paws of course.

  26. max

    Whew. Good thing about the paws.

  27. Pingback: unsavory beverage crisis « celluloid blonde

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