new neighbors


dissonance.pngNew neighbors are moving in.

They are moving in to the corner unit at the end of the hall the really annoying rude single child obnoxious fashionista used to be in.

The new neighbors have a lot of friends. Also they are really loud. Like they turn up the music so loud no one in their loft can hear anyone else speak and then leave the door open in hopes this will alleviate sonic pressure on ear drums and allow them to live through the loud music.

This necessitates anyone talking on a cell phone to move at least four doors down from the actual loft and yell into a cell phone. That is approximately right outside my door and all the friends have cell phones so is sort of a constant people — usually young women with high nasally voices — yelling into cell phones with too many “oh my gods” thrown in outside my door in the echoey concrete hall that shoots all conversations straight into my loft at amplified levels and supersonic speed.

Usually I would be real annoyed at all this except —

They are closer to Violent Psycho Neighbor Man.

Something in me just gets really happy knowing he is one door closer to the new loud neighbors and is going to go freaking ballistic living next door to happy play the music too loud leave the door open to echoey concrete halls scream into your cell phone outside the neighbors’ doors people.

It is the little things in life.

Happy sigh.


where the art work comes from :
that is dissonance verse 2 by ryan s. lemke

12 Responses to new neighbors

  1. i have a neighbour i can’t stand either

    she hangs out on the balcony smoking all the time so we can’t enjoy ours, has two smelly cats who’ve peed in the hallway, makes overtures of friendliness to us but quite frankly i just want her to move. it would be easier if she were younger yet she’s in her fifties and alone. sad, really.

  2. …and because this is my first visit but certainly not the last, just wanted to say i loved the slide –
    and if there had to be one item to put in your ‘people who suck’ category, you chose very well.

  3. max

    Thanks, Letters. Probably I am cursed by the stars because of Susan but the slide kind of rocks, doesn’t it? I love that slide. It was totally frivolous enterprise at the expense of everything I should have been doing and did not because screw that the slide was more fun and that just made me happy.

  4. “usually young women with high nasally voices — yelling into cell phones with too many “oh my gods”” – I find this funny. I hear those “oh my gods” and think of that song “Valley Girls.”

  5. Today, I am officially the new neighbor. I just moved… Tired now.

  6. max

    Woeful, that was you?

  7. I stood above these rail road tracks once and it looked like these two trains were on the same track and that they were going to hit head on.

    I couldn’t run or scream or even say ” God ” I just stood there.

    Your new neighbors and your psycho neighbor are making me feel the same way…

  8. max

    I think this is not going to be as exciting as when Faux Record Producer Guy and Bi Polar Violent Neighbor Guy were fisticuffing it up in the hall. The new people were having some sort of moving in party and may settle down once they are in. But that loud music right by Violent Neighbor Guy just made me happy all inside in a real evil way.

  9. Oh Shucks, I thought this was going to the USA Movie Channel version of Melrose Place or something.

    Okay, I’ll ask…what kind of music was it?
    Techno I hope…just when you think it’s done

    I only know because it was almost the last thing my son ever heard on this earth – and it almost was the last thing I heard as a free woman.

  10. max

    Nothing I recognized. Some sort of pounding instrumental.

  11. Techno.
    I was right.

  12. Your building…I almost wrote “it just ain’t right” when I realized I’d be absolutely lying.

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