max prognosticates on search engine questions & really worries about those gummy bears

cat god



Looking at search engine terms it is clear many people on the web are seriously lost and confused. Fortunately I am a giver so in the interests of helping out here, here you go Lost And Confused Search Engine Peeps.




1. Mirco is here: Mirco.

[Mirco is also mine so quit it you pervos.]

2. Jared Padalecki’s towel episode [and episode better mean television episode because anything else would just be wrong] is here: Pervos do too many searches for Jared Padalecki in a towel.

[Listen I know he is cute but you are doing this all wrong. Get the YouTube and put him on your blog like God intended. Sheesh. Do I have to think of everything here?]

3. If you are doing this many searches for gangrene info it is time to see a doctor. Really. I mean it. Pick up that phone and dial.

4. Max and Rambo do not belong in the same sentence. Ever. Not unless “rambo” is a verb. And you weren’t using it that way were you? Right. Shoo.

5. There is only one way to get the Club Penguin jackhammer. The old fashioned way. Buy it.

6. No. Flyers on windshields do not work.

7. Koko learned English to flirt up William Shatner. We all did.

8. Yes there is a pet food recall. Go read about it right now.

9. No you should not stick a pin through a gummy bear.

10. No you should not have sexual fantasies about gummy bears.

[And since this is not David Letterman and I am not held down to a ten count.]



Quit it.

p.s.: yes, jensen ackles is in a towel too but i hear his mother surfs the net so i am not telling you that

17 Responses to max prognosticates on search engine questions & really worries about those gummy bears

  1. LMAO at number three! True indeed!

    And of course, frowning at number ten – for real?

    Sickos out there. Lots of them!

  2. max

    I think the gummy bears are getting more action than me.

  3. I find #11 hysterical.

  4. max

    I guess gummy bears are not just for breakfast any more.

  5. aj

    I don’t know which is more elusive now, the Porno Gummy Bear or the Green M&M.

  6. I think porno gummy bears are the BEST! Woo-hoo!!!

  7. Z

    I don’t know… Gusto Gummi was kind of hot.

  8. max

    I think Anita is doing those searches for fun because she knows that search term makes my hair stand up.

  9. Anita’s Research From the Net turned up the following :

    On Gummy Bear Sex- this comment killed me I found it with something called the ” 7 deadly Gummy Sins-”

    I didn’t realize when I was coming to this site that there would be explicit (gummy bear) sex. Perhaps you should warn people. Some of us surf at work, …

    I also found XXX Gay Bears- wasn’t brave enough to look at the site itself.

    And I found something about Gummy Bears and Nutella Spread – who’d have thought stuff you bought for lunch could SOUND so nasty?

    Oh and there was this:

    Gummy Bear Sex The Wonderful World of Gummybear Sex. Even Gummy Bears need to have fun, sweet cuddly tasty bears. The naughty culprits. The gummy job. Gummy girl on top …


    The WonderfulWorld of Gummybear Sex!Find out what Others are saying about the Gummy Bear Sex page! … So, you want to link the GummyBear Sex page from yours?

    demonbaby: Naked transvestites and giant gummy bears …

  10. max

    So. It was you Anita Marie!

  11. ;-)
    Keepin’ it real and gummy.

  12. Z

    Wow. That one comment is so naughty word laden you’ll never get out from under the dirty googlers.

  13. max

    Mocking the porno gummy bear googlers has gone drastically awry.

  14. Sometimes things just don’t go according to plan.

  15. max


  16. I think you need to rectify this situation and at once. Pronto, girl! Cuz it ain’t right when a malleable piece of inanimate food stuff gets more action. Melt those bastards and bathe in it, you’ll feel so much better. Epsom salts are overrated.

    Check these links out:


  17. Pingback: anita marie « celluloid blonde

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