i do not sleep


unmade bed lilo raymondI do not sleep —

It is 8 am when I type this and I have not slept. Yet.

I had kind of an epiphany about this yesterday, or the day before, I forget.

When you do not sleep mornings and nights and days kind of merge.

I think I am afraid to dream.

Kind of a problem. It makes you wonky, going too long without sleep. Cute, charming, but kind of fractured.

Maybe it is time to stop fearing dreams.


where the art work comes from :
that is unmade bed by lilo raymond
and that is the best link i can find for him

34 Responses to i do not sleep

  1. I hate to hear this because I totally understand. I’ve been having the exact same problem over the last six weeks. My insomnia doesn’t have anything to do with dreams, though.
    I’ve tried wearing myself out exercising, melatonin, Benadryl, wine…
    Nothing works.
    You’re not alone. I’m up too.

  2. Kym

    Get off the computer for at least 2 hours before you go to bed… At least that is what I’ve heard. Read, meditate, have a phone conversation but no video/tv etc.

    Course what works for me might not work for you but it tames the dreams.

  3. max

    Maybe I will try melatonin again. I cannot tonight I was sick today and my stomach is pretty mad so no capsules. I should try reading at night too. That is a good idea.

  4. Kym

    Fish oil is supposed to help even out moods, relax, and add mental acuity but What I’ve really noticed is my skin is supple! I’d try that. Omega brite brand keeps the product the cleanest according to my acupuncturist.

    Hope you feel better and can get some sleep.

  5. max

    I take krill oil. I have been slipping with my supplements lately though.

  6. californiablogging

    Usually, it’s easier to sleep in the colder weather but not this winter. I have to go google Krill oil now.

  7. Reading in bed always does it for me. Not sure why.

  8. It’s too bad the government in a knee-jerk reaction yanked tryptophan off the market. You can try 5-HTP but I hear it isn’t as effective. I have problems sleeping too, when it gets too bad or goes on too long I just take a Xanax holiday.

  9. Gee Max, I hate to say this, but the dreams that haunt you are the real answer–to a lot of things.

    Nice to be back. Missed you.

    Oh, and for anti-wrinkle (in the fish oil vein), I have found that L-Lysine Ointment with Vitamins A and D took away the few under eye wrinkles I had. And I’m 43:)

  10. A friend told me about Valerian Root, which usually does the trick for me. It comes in really smelly capsule form at most health food stores. Also, doctors don’t mind prescribing Lunesta for those with seriously nasty insomnia moments. Tylenol PM is another remedy designed to aid in sleep although I’ve never had it.

  11. All of this is good advice, but like my Doctor would say- you have to deal with the reason you can’t sleep.

    ( it was a HUGE problem for me last year )

    Maybe you should write more, or think more about why you are afraid to dream.

  12. Have you tried Kava? I think you can still get it at Wholefoods. They are a very good relaxant and have helped me to get good sleep.

    P.S I agree with Lulu on dreams.

  13. max

    Kris, I never heard of kava before now. I will check it out.

    Lulu it is good to see you back.

    I figure the latest dreams are me frustrated I cannot talk to anyone about what is happening with my script because of the strike. I can talk to my agent though. I will call him Monday.

    I read in bed last night. I read in bed a really REALLY long time but I made myself stay in bed and ultimately I did sleep.

    Does anyone keep a dream journal? I am thinking about trying that. It might get stuff on paper where I could really look at it.

  14. I keep one of those, it’s sort of a must have when you write the weird stuff I write…but really if I were you I’d write all that stuff down.

    I think writers aren’t used to warehousing thoughts and Ideas…it makes them bonkers after awhile…too much clutter.

  15. max

    I get lots of ideas but I do not warehouse them. I just wait and whichever idea haunts me, that is the idea that becomes a story.

    A feature script takes a long time to write, longer to get off the ground and push towards making it a movie. You are going to live with whatever you choose to write a long long time. Sometimes years. So for me there is no point saving ideas that are mere flirtations. It has to be a love affair — if it is not, I will not have the stamina to keep pushing for it over a long stretch of time.

  16. I know what that’s like, but this non-sleeping thing- if I’m not clear headed the writing suffers and that makes me less then wonderful to be around.

    Just watch out for those sleep aid things- they concern me.

  17. max

    Well it is kind of ridiculous. I have a great bed. A quiet place. Sleep should be a snap. But no. Jeesh.

  18. I record my significant dreams–it is part of my spiritual discipline, and often I am spoken to through dreams, if you catch my drift. Of course, we are all familiar with the psychology of the subconscious, and the fact that the dreamscape can be a language of that profound space in our brains. What most people don’t realize is that the subconscious can also be a porthole to other realms.

    I would recommend journaling your dreams, Max, and forget the drugs. Drugs will further complicate the brain, and prolong the problem. If you follow the threads of the dreams, they will lead to the core fears, and that is the anxiety that keeps the mind spinning, and the sleep at bay. Treat the dreams like your lover–invite them into your bed with you, and that way you can embrace and defeat your fears. As absurd as it sounds, fear of fear is the worst and often biggest problem of all. Fear of pain is second.

    No one mentioned a really good sleep aide, and one I highly recommend: a really good fuck.

  19. max

    Hmm. Maybe I should have pounced that cute delivery guy.

    [you crack me up]

  20. max

    You know if I even tried something like that I would feel like a bad letter to Penthouse and be laughing too hard to do it.

  21. On the other hand…if you can’t sleep you could write the letter anyway.

    Unless the delivery guy shows up again.

    Then you could write it together.
    wink wink wink

  22. max

    “Dear Penthouse: It had been a week of long, hot, restless nights. I lay on the bed, sleepless, my skin covered in a thin sheen of sweat, when the doorbell rang….”

  23. californiablogging


  24. I can’t sleep very well during the week. Once Friday comes, however, I can crawl into bed and not get up until Monday morning. Which isn’t very productive.

  25. max

    So two nights running I very on purpose slept and dreamed and I got my answer and the answer is someone is visiting uninvited and I am creeped out.

    These are not my dreams and someone not me is unlocking doors and walking through them.

  26. Ah–there you go. It is simple (and this is my area.) Don’t be afraid. Ask whoever it is what they want. They either want to:

    A) Deliver a message
    B) They are lost or trapped

    If A, once they get it off their chest, they should move on.

    If B, tell them they are in the wrong place, and they were supposed to move on, and you can’t allow them to be here.

    There is a C, but you may prefer to email me privately about that. I have an excellent book, and technique that is very effective at eliminating this sort of thing.

    There is also a D, which is you may be, for some reason, having past-live memories. It may be relevent for this life, but it can be a bit traumatic and unnerving just the same.

  27. max

    This is someone alive. This is not a spirit.

    I will email you.

  28. Oh, this thread cracks me up.

    Max, I nibble on fresh slices of turkey from Whole Fiends. It’s lean and a nice source of protein too and makes me oh so sleepy! Keep some in the fridge and try it, seriously.

    Also…what Lulu said lol

  29. Oh, this thread cracks me up.

    Max, I nibble on fresh slices of turkey from Whole Fiends. It’s lean and a nice source of protein too and makes me oh so sleepy! Keep some in the fridge and try it, seriously.

    Also…what Lulu said lol

  30. californiablogging

    Max, get a dog,pepper spray, a hidden video camera, motion sensor lights, a panic button, a muscle man boyfriend, a base ball bat and a gun. Aim for the balls!

  31. The dog, the gun, the motion sensor lights, the hidden video camera, the panic button, and the muscle man boyfriend all sound way too high maintenance.

    Max, just get a baseball ball and write BIFF on it. And then aim for the balls.

  32. ari

    don`t do pills, i wouldn`t do it…try anything but medication

  33. Pingback: Early Morning Blogging « Unknown Pundit

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