conversations with inanimate objects
INT. MAX’S BEDROOM — DAY
On MAX, stalking away from —
The BIZARRELY TWISTED COMFORTER COVER holding all her socks hostage after a more bizarre and also unfortunate dryer incident —
Max: Screw you Comforter Cover! You want this kind of drama you had better be signing a pay check!
Bizarrely Twisted Comforter Cover: Walk away now but sooner or later you are going to need these socks.
[cue evil bizarrely twisted comforter cover laughter]