It is Cartoon Day yay! The first time I saw Calvin and Hobbes, that is the cartoon I saw. I cracked up big — wow I so remember the whack on the butt I got that day. [Not the day I saw the cartoon, perv, the day I pulled that toll booth stunt.] *Cartoon Day […]
I have been digging through the past. There was a photo I wanted to find. I have not found the photo. That is making me pretty crazy I know a lot of photos got lost, but I was pretty sure I had that one. Along with a group of photos that were all kid photos. […]
According to family lore, my first words [words, not word, that is not a typo that is a plural] were “Give me that doll.” No mommy. No daddy. I just opened my mouth and started giving orders. I have not changed much. I did get a little taller and pick up a nifty foil job […]
By the age of three, I was addicted to cigarettes, could happily live on sugar water, was adept at zipping down car windows to utter a string of invectives [along with hand gestures] at drivers in other cars, and had already achieved falling down drunk. That is what I call early development. My mother does […]
This is an old thought. I wrote it for siliconsalley.com but that was a long time ago and I thought I would bring it here now. the place where waves shake sand in circles I was talking to Emily about doing this column. [Author Note: Emily was the editor who asked me to write […]
My hand is peeling. I eye it. Why would my hand be peeling? I have not been out in the sun really, I have not burned myself — Oh. Wait. There was that “battery acid” incident. I thought battery acid was just made up by my mother to terrorize me right before she made […]