black is the color of my heart

I have been —

Morose. And there is only one answer for morose. A survey! Yay!

[As always, this survey is stolen from Rachael because, well, Rachael does the best surveys and also I am too lazy to make up my own.]

 

---

Twenty Questions with Absolutely No Coherent Theme

1. Beatles or Stones?
Are we in the wilderness? What is with the bugs and rocks?

2. Have you ever vacuumed the house in your underwear?
Do not judge me. Damn you.

3. Do you secretly like disco?
That is hip hop in spandex right?

4. Have you ever had a monster under your bed?
How polite of you to not say “in my bed.”

5. Coke or Pepsi?
Vodka Baby.

6. If you thought you could get away with it, would you?
Are we robbing an armored car or having sex in public?

7. If you thought you would get caught, would you anyway?
Are we robbing an armored car or having sex in public?

8. Do you have an adventure fantasy? If yes, what is it?
Are we robbing an armored car or….

9. You’ve lost everything. Do you lie, beg, borrow or steal to get it back?
You say that like I haven’t. Twice.

10. You’re driving too fast through a residential neighborhood. A dog and a fat man are crossing the street from opposite directions. You have to hit one to avoid hitting the other. Who gets run over?
Sorry fat dude.

11. Are you saving that morsel of food that is stuck in your teeth for a special occasion?
Mardis Gras is right around the corner Smart Ass.

12. If you were invisible, where would you hang out?
Hello? No clothes? Look for me by the heater.

13. You are drunk as a skunk. Do you ride A) a mechanical bull B) a stolen motorcycle C) A butt ugly member of the opposite sex
I am going with shopping cart, Alex.

14. Are we human? Or are we dancer?
Just because I have horns that is no reason to make reindeer cracks. Rude!

15. A train leaves NYC at 2PM EST, heading west at 140mph. A plane leaves LA at the exact same time, heading east at 700mph. Where’s Waldo?
Ahhh! Math fugue!

16. You’re standing butt naked on a street corner. Are you A) a pervert B) waiting for the bus C) The Emperor
An optimistic bus driver wrote this survey right?

17. What is the color of love?
Black. Black like the color of my heart. Damn you Love.

18. Will Michael Jackson be allowed into Rock & Roll Heaven?
Dunno. Rumor has it they have pretty strict immigration policies.

19. In one word or less, describe your nose.
Oh I see. More reindeer cracks.

20. Do you think the world is going to end in 2012?
My world or yours?

 

where i nabbed that survey :
i nabbed that survey at rachael’s doy

where the art work comes from :
that is from michael bentburn