beware the wrath o' gluten!

I had this brilliant thought today. From now on when food shamers attack — wave gluten at them!

Yay! Yay! Yay!

I could see this clearly in my head. Me waving my little stalk o’ wheat at nefarious food shamers. Nefarious food shamers recoiling in horror like Kolchak vampires recoiling from a cross. There would be hissing. There would be clawing. Maybe some fang action, even maybe a little smoking skin action. It all seemed so perfect —

Then I remembered this Jimmy Kimmel clip:

 

[youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AdJFE1sp4Fw]

 

It’s not going to be fun at all if food shamers don’t recoil away like a Kolchak vampire — and if I have to stop each time and explain it IS gluten I am waving at them AND explain what gluten is, well that is going to suck the joy right out of it.